A poopy day

Advisory: Not a post for the quizzy or weak stomach folks. Proceed with Caution.

If ever there was a scene from my life that could use a list of profanities to help clarify the deep emotional response I was feeling, it might have been today. But, I also will forever look back on today and laugh at the absolute hysterical sequence of events that led to one poopy day!

Friday! TGIF in full swing. GranT and I have worked our buns off transforming the house. We have gone from a functioning one kid home to a completely functional two kid friendly home. I am forever thankful for all her help. Today, was our play/rest day after a full week. We went to the Columbus Antique Malls, John Deer store and farmers market. Then headed home for lunch and pool time!

Wyatt loved swimming in his pool. He kept talking about Bethie and Lukie. He would swim, then run around the yard. Noticing his feet were "yuckie" he'd jump back in the pool and clean them off. He was such a joy to watch. But, with all good things there comes an end. Our end started with a blow out "swimmie" diaper. Poopy diapers are bad enough when it starts creepin out the top and sides, but then add a wet swim diaper to the equation and it's becomes poopie pool party 2011. I attempted to lay W down on a towel and change him, but he was so upset about the poopy diaper that he kept hitting himself and saying, "yuckie!" Then because of all the hitting and attempting to pull the diaper off himself he ended up with poop on both his hands! I finally got the diaper off, cleaned him the best I could and ran him up stairs to the bath. Leaving behind, a poop covered towel, a dirty diaper, poop floating in the pool and two dogs all in the backyard. Lucky for me, GranT came to the rescue cleaned up the mess in the backyard.

Wyatt, exhausted from a full day laid right down for his nap and was sound asleep after ten minutes. I dumped out the poopy pool water. Cleaned the pool and then peaked in at Wyatt. He looked so sweet and restful, that I decided to take a nap too! It was refreshing. We woke up a few hours later and headed out for round two of adventures.

We were on a hunt for Cold Stone!!! Yes, ice cream before dinner is not uncommon in this house. Wyatt was yelling "ice cream!!" the whole way. He has taken an unnatural liking to ice cream as well. Just in case you wondered were we found a Cold Stone near by you should be! Because, while I was in Ohio the Hamilton Cold Stone closed! Oh the dire disappointment! In it's place now stands a frozen yogurt (store, place, parlor, shop, not sure what to call it?). Anyway, we decided to try it out and were very happy with it! We want to take Daddy there when he gets home.

By the time we got back home it was already 730pm. Which is bath time for Wyatt. He really wanted to play outside before bath so I caved and let him go outside in the backyard. Only to discover... The dogs had poop on them! Human poop from the major blow that I didn't think they'd roll in! I don't know why I thought this, I just did. Gertie had major amounts of poop just matted into her fur. It was on her back, neck, and ears! I am sure she really thought she smelled lovely. Charlie was not without fault either. In fact, I'm sure it was his idea to roll in the poop. He is always the one to start the mischief then Gertie blindly follows and takes everything too far.

I am trying to figure out how to clean two poop smeared dogs when GranT suggested rubber gloves. I don't have rubber gloves or that would have been great. She decided to take Wyatt inside and feed him dinner while I handle the outside situation. I decided to tie the dogs up to the fence and power wash them. Ok, I didn't really use a power washer. But, I did use the sprayer turned to a very high pressure setting. I had to! Especially on Gertie with that poop matted into her fur! Finally, I got her cleaned and shampooed. I knew if I left her in the backyard she start rolling around in the mud so I let her in the house. But, I ordered her to the garage. She took that as an invitation to run stupidly upstairs and hide from the now crazy mommy! I leaped up those stairs after her, never crossed my mind I was pregnant, chasing her down and having to pull her down the stairs as she resisted. Once down the stairs I again told her to get in the garage! She hunkered down low to the carpet and refused. I grabbed her neck skin and jerked her up, I mean encouraged her. I must have reminded her of Cruella DeVil because out of sheer terror she peed on the carpet!!!!!! I might have then dragged her across the living room by the skin of her neck and thrown her in the garage.

Next, Charlie's turn. Basically, same deal. Tie dog to fence, Pressure wash dog, shampoo, dry, and throw dog into garage with now whimpering dog one.

Oh by the way, we got a new neighbor. She is a veterinary! All I could think is, I don't even care if she thinks I'm being cruel to my dogs! Now in hindsight, I do believe if ever a child poops in the backyard again I will be sure to pick it up before the dogs have a chance to roll in it's tempting aroma. Lesson learned.